Posts

Showing posts from March, 2021

Goggles Over Glasses

My mother had been looking for her reading glasses for a while. She purchased them from Walmart. They were readers, you know the pre-prescribed kind .15, 2.0, etc. She lives in a 700 square foot home and has a grand penchant for the talent of a seasoned hoarder. I can see how easy it can be to misplace something there. As well being 76 and just coming off of anesthesia from cataract surgery, her memory might still be impaired a bit.  She was given a new eyeglass prescription from the Cataract Doctor after her last follow up visit in January, but had not until early March got the Rx filled. Her new glasses are lovely. They are purple framed and bi-focal. She looks cute in them. I called her Monday to check in with her. The call was on Duo. She answered the phone luckily for me. She was heading to the rear of the property to do some work. On the cell screen I see she has goggles over her new glasses. She also showed me that she was wearing the construction gloves I gave her on my last vi

Short Story Beginning: To Be Continued

Image
Spoons and Forks and knives and straws and little toothpicks with umbrellas were splattered about on the table. Somewhere among the items was a used ice cream scoop, but no sign of ice cream anywhere. There was a half eaten loaf of bread and a crumb of cheese. It looked like Swiss. Cranberries from those Ocean Spray bags had spilled to the floor. Summer Sausage was sliced nicely on a platter. The crackers were still in their box. Foot prints in flour from the two little dogs lead to the open door of the patio. I could hear music from the sounds of Motown in the otherwise still air. As I stepped onto the patio I noticed a bag that had been dropped with items spilling out from it. I looked about the property and still no one was anywhere around. There was no party planned that I was aware of. I had only dropped by to check on my friend because I had not heard from her in a while. The door was ajar when I arrived, so I let myself in thinking perhaps she may have been on her way out and wo

I Be

Supposedly I am suppose to dig deeper. I am suppose to be in the throws of birth pains and to some extent birthing something from within that needs to come into the world. I am to be pushing. Push! Push! "Ice Cream Soda Water Lemonade tell me the letter of your boyfriends name." Of course this is one of those songs that little black girls sing differently from little other girls. I googled it. I read that we all have gifts. We need to share these gifts with the world. Our gifts will be reveal to us. We all will discover our gifts. Our gifts will be uncovered. "Miss Mary Mack Mack Mack all Dressed in Black Black Black with 24 buttons buttons buttons up and down her back back back." Some of our minds are so full of information and ideas that it could might well be hard to distinguish your gift from your talent. It might well be that the brain is so full of of triviality that it has missed that connection to the heart and spirit and fell off the wagon of impregnation a

Eyelids Close For A While

Clear waters and uncluttered shores where you can see your reflection and the floor of the inlet. Every foot print like brand new baby's breath as you move toward the endlessness of journeys undertook. Clear blue skies embrace the edges of your sight enveloping your gaze without the threat of blinding. Laps of waves caress the shore and claps against the peer. Tiny movements and gestures ungulate in grains of sand and who knows what inhabits there. Cool vespers flow across your shoulders and the warmth of the air and fluidity of the sand between your toes remind you of nothingness and everything all at once. Deep breath draws in more than it has ever done in a long long while. The exhale renders a smile. Eyelids close for a while. 

Assignment of Painting is Over

Image
Overcast morning and humidity is higher and all is well. My dad is picking me up soon. He just needs to install some exterior lights, and we are done with this project. It was good to spend some time with him in efforts outside of idle chit-chat about bygone days. I have been able to drop a few acts of faith nods his way. He is as open to faith as a sealed can of sardines. But, the Lord has me here this day with him for a reason. I know he would rather go fishing on a day like today. Who knows? It might be this nice of a fishing day tomorrow. I am fisher of men. So I will be fishing no matter what. I am glad to have had this opportunity. The house turned out really nice. We did a good job. I hope he takes away something from this experience. I know I did.

Aretha

Had to put on some Queen of Soul yesterday. I was eager to hear "I Say A Little Prayer." I have only this CD on the rack. I know I could just go to youtube and play whatever and whenever, but I wanted the CD. It is a pity I do not have the album. Hearing the clicks and cracks of the start of vinyl would been a triggering jolt of good dopamine. See, the only man that could ever reach me was a... "Son of a Preacher man!"  My cousin in Virginia just finished her comedy school. She performed in front of 150 people. She looked like she was having fun. I went on my sister's facebook account to see a photo posted of her on stage just smiling and playing to the audience. I am thrilled for her. Regarding her future, "I Say A Little Prayer." I hope this is the last day of painting. It is for me anyway. It has been nice helping out my dad. I even got to see my brother yesterday while on the work site. He was on his way to strip a car down at the local pick and pu

In and Out Of Space

In and out of spaces time and places moving fast yet still complacent not a spark or motivation letting iterations vacate vasillation in a state of perplexed thought pressed on all sides broken caught sowed up throwed up making fodder completely wanting to be bothered undefined by expectations trapped up in all this shi!ty waiting could be moving but toward what do I even give a F@C%! (Not my usual flair- but oh Well! It is what it is)

Painting Houses

I just got good and started on the second day of tile cleaning when my dad shows up. I had told him that I would help him paint a house. He is using a sprayer, so this should not be a long ordeal. However, about a fifth of the way through the job, his sprayer refused to cooperate. So, he jumps in his truck and proceeds to purchase another sprayer from Harbor Freight. About an hour later he returns and about forty minutes after that we have the sprayer assembled. I was in charge of taping windows and other house attachment so as to avoid painting things such as light fixtures, mailboxes, etc. I got as much taped as we had tape, so a few items were exposed. We ran out of painters tape and plastic. He got back started and the painting went pretty fast. We get to a stopping point and my dad sits for a long while. I finally grab the sprayer and finish off where he left off. We still have one side to paint and that is the rear. We also have to do a second coat, trim, skirting and touch up an

Pop Song for Tweens- Don't Talk so Fast

Please don't talk so fast Don't take me too seriously Please don't make me laugh Sometimes when I laugh I start to wheeze And if you hold my hand It might be possible  that sweaty palms  might hurt our plans Yeah blow some bubbles and hand out some balloons  and put on high tops and dance around the room Ahhhhhh yeah Hey yeah Ahhhhhh yeah Hey yeah  Play some guitar or maybe violin And we might make it to being best of friends Ahhhhhh yeah Hey yeah Ahhhhhh yeah Hey yeah  (Needs Chorus/Hook)

Lists

I never considered myself a "list" person. However, as I look over my life and even around my house today, I have lists everywhere. I write things down because I do not want to forget stuff. I write things down because my memory is not as great as it use to be. I write things down because I want things done. Rearranging the living room is today's task. It's on the list. Culling though the paperwork that is scattered in two rooms is today's task. Getting to those tiles on hands and knees is today's task. Going to the credit union for my sister to make a deposit is today's task. Making a duplicate key for the mail box is today's task. These are on the list. Praying without ceasing is today's task. Looking for the surprises that the Lord has in store for me is today's task. Being kind and sharing smiles is today's task. Picking up items from around town is today's task. Receiving good energy and great vibes is the task for the day. Giving

Grace

Attitude of Gratitude  Position of Submission Disposition of Dispensation Glad in His Glory Treasured in His Truth Jubilated in His Jubilee Abounding in Abase Abasing in Abound Humbled in His Heirship Renewed in His Resurrection Formed for Fulness Secure in Sanctity Greased with Grace

Good day

Daily Commitments are easy and hard. They are easy in that what is asked is not typically difficult to accomplish. If you just show up to the day and the task, it is most likely that something will come of it. It is hard because there is something within mankind that is hell bent on rebellion.  Rebellion is: T he action or process of resisting authority, control, or convention. Resisting is: T rying   to prevent by action or argument. Process is: A  series of actions or steps taken in order to achieve a particular end. But what exactly, or better yet who exactly, are these authorities? What is this control? Where are these conventions and who is hosting them? Is resistance futile? Is resistance fertile? Why is resistance not obsolete? Can we understand that resistance cuts both ways? Resistance is as necessary as our inhale is to our exhale... How do we get to the point where we are the  surreptitious  orchestrators  of our own killing, stealing and destroying? How can we get to where

The Dream of Us (Lyrics to a sad song)

I dreamed last night of Daffodils and merry making fun I held myself in warmth and found the dream had just begun And when I felt the urge to join in with a song I suddenly awake to find the dream and I were gone And now's the time when wind rushes through the air the thoughts of you are everywhere and this love I cannot bare because the dream of us the theme of us's not there You held my hand that winter day when we were young and bold The day was long and all we did was laugh and get along But somewhere in our lives the time we had grew long and cold And now's the time when wind rushes through the air the thoughts of you are everywhere and this love I cannot bare because the dream of us the theme of us's not there (Chorus) Tell me when the tears will finally end Tell me when my heart will ever mend and songs of old  I'll sing them once again my friend You held my hand that winter day when we were young and bold The day was long and all we did was laugh and get alo

Repairing the Fence

Image
My Fence is starting to go down hill. Not all of it, just about 38 feet. Yesterday I took out the impact drill and removed the screws of these pickets and planks from half of the row that needs repair. They are sitting against the remaining fence waiting for me and my dad to go to the box store to gather treated 2x4s. So, today might be the day of completion of the repairs to this fence, and I would like to stain it soon. It has been standing for going on 7 years. It is due for a makeover. I enjoy taking care of what I have been given. I am thankful for the ability to do the work. I receive every good and perfect gift from the Lord this day .

Let Your Light Shine

Covid-19 has been a terrible event in the world. For many it has devastated their lives with losses of loved ones before their time. Many have had economic tragedies. A lot of people have lost their homes, their transportation, their jobs, their advantage or even their minds to this virus.  This virus has reshaped education, putting some further behind and some further ahead. It has rocked our health system, our education system, our government system, our judicial systems, and our religious systems. It has delivered riches to some and struggles to many. The price we have paid in so many ways is unimaginable, and yet after 530,000,000 million deaths here in the United States of America, those of us who are still blessed with breath in our lungs keep moving forward. What choice to do have? I don't know what the future holds beyond billions of people being vaccinated, but I know who holds the future. There are always surprises around the corner and cynicism and pessimism will begin t

All the Snacks- Children's Picture book

Macaroni peanut better ketchup mustard orange soda hot dogs snow cones chocolate will all into my stomach fit pizza corn dogs chicken nuggets corn nuts crackers I just love it milk and juice box cherry grape and apple slices don't be late with ravioli fruit snacks biscuits add another pancake fit it waffles cocoa banana splits get all this in my stomach quick Now on the play ground off we go the swing is first then run some more to slide down slides and swing on ropes the merry go round is not a joke but wait something is happening my tummy's making sounds and pings must sit down on ground quickly oh no! oh no! my snacks want free

In All Things

The topic of brief discussion with my cousin this morning was: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Virtues that would need instituting. It was a great short talk and a good reminder for me to examine myself. I found that I am struggling with Pride and Anger still. The opposite of each are Humility and Patience. I might have a tad bit of Envy in there, too. My life requires Gratitude to quell that spirit. So today, I commit again to submit to God's will for my life. I commit to Waiting on the Lord in agreement with His will for all life. I commit again to be grateful and thankful in all things, for this is the will of God concerning me in Christ Jesus. Be blessed!

Utopia or Heaven- Work in Progress*

Image
After landing in Amsterdam from a 15 hour flight from Dallas, TX, we were exhausted. It was May 14th, 2002. He and I had never traveled that far from home before. He didn't have a passport before he met me. He did more traveling across the country than he had ever done in his 41 years; this was probably because he was an unfocused pothead and had low self-esteem. I was a very focused codependent looking to find a way to rescue this relationship by seeing if moving to Europe was a viable option for an unredeemed pothead-coke head. I would be his would be Christ. We were given a box of chocolates to give to Cyril's twin cousins who lived in the city proper. Cyril had arranged for us to stay with his cousins for a day or two upon arrival. We lugged our large duffle bags from the airport onto the Tram. Cyril told us to purchase  Strippenkaart cards to pay for our Tram fare. Schiphol airport would have them. As we awaited the trolley, we knew we were terribly exhausted. Jet lag was

My Friend Millie's Suggestions

Image
Ernestine~~~ Got to get it in!!!

Putting on Packing On

My doctor informed me that my recent weight gain is most likely age related.  From medlineplus.gov: Menopause   is the time in a woman's life when her period stops. It usually occurs naturally, most often after age 45.   Menopause   happens because the woman's ovaries stop producing the hormones estrogen and progesterone. A woman has reached   menopause   when she has not had a period for one year. Between September and November 2020 I went from 146 to 172. I was unnerved. 158 was about as heavy as I've even been. I thought if I cut out some recent medications I was taking, I could alter the trajectory of the extra pounds.  Increasing my exercising and attentively adjusting my diet has not yielded the results I wanted either.  I will still cut down the meds and eventually remove the medicine from my routine since the nation has settled into calm and I don't think I need anti-depressants any longer. The weight for the outside world means nothing. It is more often I am to

Opening Twisted Whirl

Int: Middle aged woman driving a large truck with windows down and head phones slightly on is yell at children in the car. One teen has a cellphone trying to get his mother's attention. The other two are fighting. In the back seat the boy punches the girl. The girl punches the boy. Woman Miles! Miles! I'm driving. Put that... get away... boy... Miles But mommy look! Woman (She says through her teeth) I'm driving!  Woman (Cont'd) You two, stop! You know what... I'm pulling over... Get out the car! Get out! Get! Ext: Park. Children dart away from the car. The woman tries to gain her composure. Miles (Yells to his siblings) Mommy said stop! (Woman sits next to disheveled woman on the bench.) Woman They don't listen! (Bench Woman nods and leans back) (Woman has on overalls and sits legs apart. She puts her headphones back on) Ext: Man sits across the way on a bench watching children play. His gaze becomes strange as he seems entranced on the children. Ext: Camera Tr

Play On

I am but a bow in the hand of my maker crossing the strings of this violin but played by the hands of our maker. Both bow and violin lay ready and exposed. As vulnerable as every blade of grass and every fowl and ocean reef as every child and mountain peak, our needs are echoes of our maker as we are fed and led replete. I speak of subtle majesty. I speak as one with deep belief. No snare or trap shall snatch me free from all that God has promised me. Use me. Use me. Let trumpets play. Let drums beat forth. Let lyrics flee. Let voices rise. Let nothing cease. To avail each self to the maker's plea.

Street Cones

Image
Orange cones line the parking spaces of the Event Center across from me. It is an attempt to keep the tiny Brunch Restaurant from taking the parking spaces. It is a pandemic and events should be limited to 50 percent capacity. The event space, this Bijoux, is listed at over 5000 sq ft. It has one 3x3 bathroom. Having been in this space, no amount of money would coax me in there during a virus outbreak. Nonetheless, the orange cones represent a strong signal to the adjacent businesses (which all adjoin), a waging Mutumbo finger, "Not in my house or anywhere around me." The Breakfast business, has five parking spaces they share with 2 other business. One business, a small speak easy,  opens after 5pm when breakfast is over. The other business operates normally. It is a small shop selling novelty and tourist type items. Cold wars are all around. I guess it is better than getting towed.

Remember That Time

Taking this free one day online class with UCLA, the instructor's prompt in writing poetry  from memories was:       I Remember Here is my version from childhood- I remember now-or-laters in the Summer when momma would give us a nickel to go to the store I remember popping wheelies and makeshift ramps I remember building go-carts and stilts I remember going behind bushes, up trees, and into thickets I remember laying down in the bed of the orange Ford Truck around dark staring at the sky I remember pulling the tail off a lizard with my brother I remember snails, lighting bugs and red ants I remember the sounds that came from my mother's tummy when I laid upon her lap I remember asking my mother lots of questions I remember not liking her to ask me a lot of questions I remember telling her, "why are you asking me? You the grown up!" I remember putting clothes hangers on our heads and pretending to be aliens I remember exploring the attic by why of scaling the bathroom

Shards

My mother was driving my sister and me out to her parents house. My grandparents lived 7 and a half miles from our house, but in another city. I would learn to time this drive because it would be a consistent part of my life, like periods would become and losing baby teeth, or bi-weekly pay checks.  As we went over the Highway 84 bridge the sign showed the population of our city. It was 110,000. Today forty-five years later or so, it is 138,000. We would drive under the 1-35 corridor bridge and twaddle toward my grandparents house at 25 miles per hour. One day momma stopped at the "filling station" to get gas at the half way point. I told her that I had to go to the bathroom. She said I could and my sister went with me. We were maybe about 6 and 7 years old. My sister is the youngest. I don't know why my brothers were not with us (they were 8 and 10). It was most often all four children with momma everywhere and all the time. We enter this blue metal door on the side of t

Accountability and Viable Options

In my city I cannot drive down many streets without seeing the Catholic Church Propaganda machine in action. Whether it's billboards or Yard Signs, without ceasing, the city is pummeled with their version of a solution. In my town, the Catholic Church owns over 30 million dollars in tax shielded buildings and property alone. Many members of these communities (living breathing people) circle their wagons in business and belief. That's a lot of propaganda power. That's a lot of shame and guilt. That's a lot of... If people were really open to solutions, we would not see these signs. I mean if people were really open to solutions that require human beings to be humans doing the work God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit actually called us to do, these billboards and signs would actually not be necessary. How about equal access to financial mobility. What say you to fair life sustaining wages. How about you walk with young girls and women and provide them with opportunities to b

Afraid? Of What? Of Who?

Fear Shame and Anger. These are the three types or classes that make up the Enneagram. 8, 9, and 1 land in Anger. 2, 3, and 4 are Shame. This leaves 5, 6, and 7 being Fear. 2, 3, and 4 types operate through heart and self image. 5, 6, and 7 types operate through their head. 8, 9, and 1, types are Body and Gut oriented. There is not a doubt in my mind that I am 8 with dashes of 9 or what they call wing 9. Also, I am a lot of 5 because I am rationale, logical, detailed and information oriented. Now that I have gotten that out of the way, my earliest memories are cemented in my head. I can remember the first time when the outside world of peoplehood and authority intruded on me. And what was my God given natural response? It was ANGER. I am surprised that my bottom lip doesn't hang 4 inches off my face because of the anger I had raging in me. Squinty eyed, Poked out lip, folded arms or clinched fist, muttering under my breath, huff and puffing and dug in heels were my mode of operandi

Do it Now! Do it Now! Do it Now!

I rarely ever wear make-up. My sister sold Mary-Kay in the mid 90's and would beg me, hound me, pester me endlessly about purchasing product. "Do it now! Do it now! Do it now!" That was Mary Kay's sales motto. I took that motto later in life and made it, "I'm a DIN DIN girl! Do it now, do it now, do it now!" Then I would dart off to take care of whatever task I was referring to. Needless to say, I may have purchased one item that I can remember from her and that was a perfume named, "Angel Fire." Perfume I could do because it would not lead me to addiction. I figured if I were to start wearing make-up early on in life, I would have to wear make-up for the rest of my life. She tried to give me free make-up, too. Just like a pusher of anything that people know will lead to repeat sales, I was on to that tactic. Yesterday I spoke with my aunt who lives in Virginia by way of DUO (Facetime for Apple users). She commented oddly-- because she felt it

Zippers Are Nifty

 Zippers are nifty. They go up and down. So does the Yo-Yo, but it can go round and round. X-Rays see through you to see what's inside. Winds are much fun when kites in them glide. Volcanoes erupt and lava ooze to the ground. Umbrellas go up when the rain falls down. Turkeys run fast to avoid those big nets. Strawberries and whip cream is always the best. Rabbits sniff carrots from far far away. Quails scatter quickly when dogs are astray. Picnics can happen both day and night. Octopus swim swiftly when avoiding a fight. Needles do mend and needles can burst. Milk can be good to satisfy thirst. Ladders are used to climb very high. Kittens purr softly when they are near by. Jungle gyms full of children at play. Iguanas stay warm in the green leaves all day. Hound dog opens one eye to see who is there. Gophers dart under ground where they have not a care. Flutes ring out in song as dancers go round. Eagles perch high above without nary a sound. Dandelions in hand get blown in the air

Just Passing Thru

Realism, pragmatism, fatalism, nihilism, optimism, any-ism, other-ism, feminism, color-ism, imagism, nepotism, all the isms framed in time and space.  Because? Smidgens, dashes, smatterings, itsys, tinys, teenies, oopies, bitsies, whoopsies, littles and barely's show their faces in the most auspicious cases.  And? Almost, nearly, so-close, really, dang it, oh dear, roughly, practically, round-a-bout, nigh, all gather to witness perfection has died. So? Vanished, gone, disappeared, dissolved, swallowed up, burned out, defunct, extinct, lost, terminated, faded, evaporated, dead can all find the middle part of journey false. Why?

Ten Little Toes Bed Time Nursery Rhyme

 Ten little toes     Ten little toes          Ten little toes and one little nose one little nose and two little knees two little eyes staring right at me Two little feet and one little chin two little cheeks and one little grin One little tummy and two little hands With ten little fingers just perfectly grand one little tongue and two little lips one little drool from one little sip two little ears and one little head looks like it's time to head off to bed close your little eye lids one at a time good night little babe  sweet baby of mine

Governor and Limiter

Governors and Limiters are all around in human creations. My ceiling fan blew its self out of wack. The fan worked but the lights didn't. I tried changing the light bulbs and that yielded no repair. I swapped the ceiling fan from my back bedroom with the one not working. The exchanged ceiling fan and lights worked in the original room. The removed ceiling fan worked but the lights did not work in the back bedroom. I concluded that there was not a problem with the light switch, the fans, but with the lighting housing. I went to Lowe's and asked if they had the light housing for the fan. They neither had the housing, the fan or any intact ceiling fans of the model I had. The Lowe's employee told me to call the maker of the ceiling fan or to find the brand and purchase a new ceiling fan. Not being about that life, I turned to google. I then turned to YouTube.  I found a post on YouTube where the content creator helped me fix the problem. He showed me how to remove the limiter.

Window Panes

Image
My cousin told me that she can feel the brisk chill of the outside cold when she passes by her window. Growing up I could feel the cold as well piercing though the window pane. Walking by one left no other option some winters than to grab your shoulders cross armed and go, "burrrr." Time brings about a change and now in my home of seven year I have R-valued window panes. Double insulated windows that are a barrier to the cold chill just on the other side. Do I miss greeting Mother nature's cold chilly tap on my should as I glide by my windows? I can honestly say that I do not even think about it. Perhaps I shall next winter pull beside her with a hot cup of tea and we shall fellowship like we do in the Spring or Fall. My cousin is in a townhouse in Carrollton and is a renter. She rents for various reason, but she is about to embark on home ownership soon. She hopes to sign the papers in April. It will be a new home built from the ground up and located a ways away from the