Huck Hugh The Town Idiot

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Huck Hugh the town idiot strapped a pillow case where within was a rubber ball to his head and fashioned himself to prance along the lane and jump down the town's only well. As he went careening down the well, we all hear a loud splash and then a thud. 
Rosemary Raspberry delighted in the possibility of having work for her undertaker father. Soon we all hear, "I'm al'right." Huck Hugh uncrumbled himself from the fall. "I rather thought the well was deeper than it is." 
Buttercup Buttons darts over with a long rope and drops it down the well to Hugh. "Oh, Dear! Oh, Dear," she exclaims. Buttercup was large and girthy. She is rumored to have lifted the Troptop's cow out of a  ditch single handedly after the rains washed the poor heifer away. The cow, not Buttercup.
Rosemary Raspberry's smile soon withers into a frown. She turns back to the mortuary stamping her feet with steady disappointment. 
You see her father dotes on her rather lavishly, but business has been slow for the undertaker as of late, and Rosemary Raspberry has not received her usual lavish gifts that at one time poured in. It was because of the war you know. Bodies were littered everywhere in need of burial. She never went without those years. Huck Hugh gave her a glimmer of hope.
The towns folk were all quite well in good health. Except for the occasional fainting spell brought on by the Tiger winds from the north when the pigs are feasting, nearly everyone in the town were fit as fiddles. Oh and Rosemary Raspberry wrings her hands so rapaciously when the winds come in hoping to reap the benefits of death.
Huck Hugh is dragged legs first out of the well. Buttercup Buttons just reached down and gained hold of both feet and flung Huck into a pile of hay the now bollocks mules were feeding on. Coming face to face with an angry mule, a drenched Huck scurries quickly behind the skirt of Buttercup. Well, she about turned plum red. Seeing Buttercup Buttons' apparent thrill of Huck's involuntary affection, Huck falls out stiff as a log pretending to be dead.

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