Make New Friends But Keep The Old
... One is silver and the other's gold. I learned this song when I was around 9 or 10 years old. Throughout the decades, friends have come and gone. These friends were all ages from 3 years old to 108. Some friends I have lost through death... I cherish those 9 years of sharing life with my 108 year old friend. She passed a little over 3 years ago. What a go getter she was. She gave up driving at 99 when she had a close call leaving the Dairy Queen parking lot. She moved to my hometown to be close to her daughters a month shy of 100. She didn't start using a walker until 103.
I made friends with a three year old as she read the New York Times while on her knees on her family's couch. She put the paper down for a moment to show me how she could stand her cat, "Edmund Pettus", up on his "haunches!" Oh, My! These words coming from this 3 year old... I thought to myself. She is a keeper. She will soon be 29 years old, and we still keep in touch.
It is important for me to continue to make friends, especially younger friends. I am finding that as my older friends age, I play an important role in some of their lives. For instance, today I spent time with my 92 year old pianist friend. This older white lady from Blanket, TX is one of my best and most influential friends. I took her out to one of her favorite places to eat a burger. We landed at CUPP'S. It is a very small ma and pa diner. She was fretting about going because she has to be pushed in her Rollator walker. She hates aging. I reassured her that we would be fine and that CUPP'S has a ramp. She is getting a little forgetful as she gets on in age. We done been up this ramp four or five times already!
We arrive and wait for one of the 5 booths to open. It was very busy. We stand at the door,- well I stand at the door as she sits in the Walker. We are almost in the laps of two middle aged white women as they are close to finishing up at the 1st booth. They smile cordially at us. Jean is telling me something that I do not remember right now, but I had to lean in close to her to hear what she was saying. As I looked back up, the ladies were quickly clearing their things to make a way for the two of us to sit. I thought that was so gracious. The two ladies stepped to the counter line to pay their bill as Jean and I sat down. She never lets me help her much, so I let her struggle on to get from the walker to the booth, but I kept a keen eye on her in case I had to dive for the floor to break a fall. We settled in and the owner's wife, who knows us, took our order. The husband and wife really enjoy when we show our faces, and we enjoy seeing them.
As the two previous booth sitters were leaving, they turn and complimented Jean on how pretty she is. They ask me if I am her "caretaker?" I was like, "Who her? This is my friend. We do sing-alongs together at retirement communities. She hates for me to try to 'care' for her!" The one woman seemed surprised. Jean just smiled and tried to tell the two that we do not get to do much playing anymore because I work a lot. Then one of the ladies leans down towards me and says, "We paid for your meal." I was taken aback because Jean would not like that at all. She won't even let me pay. I told the woman as such without Jean hearing me. She and her friend just walked away with smiles on their faces. Out the door they went. They thought Jean and I were just a delight to their day.
We got our order and made it about half way through our meal. As Jean ate her burger, she saw me in deep thought and asked what I was dwelling on and thinking about. I Was Busted! I told her I was thinking about when to tell her that those two ladies paid for our meal. She said, "My Word! They didn't have to do that." I knew that was coming. She blustered and talked about returning next Saturday so that she could buy their meal. I knew that was coming, too.
I have been friends with JP, this is my nickname for her, since 2010. She is old to some people. She is just a friend to me who happens to have some miles under her belt. I do not treat her as old. I treat her as my friend.
I drove us back to her mother-in-law cottage and wheeled her to her door. I do only what is absolutely of necessity for her and no more. She hates being older. I joined her inside for what I thought would be a short while. Instead it turned into two more hours plus. She played the piano saying, "Whadoyaknow, kid!" I said let's do Blue Skies! Eventually, I figured I would record some stuff of the two of us. She has an Ipad that she uses, a Facebook account and a YouTube account. I asked her if she would like to see the recording and if she would like for me to upload it. She agreed. I also asked if she would like to make a plea to the YouTube folks to help her get me to hang out with her more to play and sing. She agreed.
Here are the results:
I will continue to make younger friends. I will need them in my life!!!
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